Mad At Myself

I did not finish my lunch because I am so mad at myself that everything, even my favourite meehoon, tasted yucky!

I am really mad at myself, mad at myself for not thinking well, speaking well and behaving well. I am so mad and disappointed...why? Why am I torturing myself with all these thoughts?

But then, its not torturing, it's self-awareneses and did I overdo it?

I am not sure but now I am sure that I am so mad at myself that for the first time, I DID NOT FINISH MY LUNCH!!!! I hate to waste food...but then, I have to waste it.

My mood made everything tasted so YUCKY!

Haiz~ sometimes, I wonder whether can I go on or not? Will I be able to move on to the next phase, where I can at least be a more effective person? I am already 28 and still moving nowhere in my life. No aim, no goal, no motive...no no nothing....

Urgghhh....I am really mad at myself for not trying hard enough.

What can I do when I cannot even control myself.